Straight Up

From the ever-reliable NY Post :

Paula Abdul is always running late, as seen on her Bravo show, "Hey Paula" - but woe to her assistants if they don't get their jobs done on time. A spy says, "There's a salon chair in her house where she gets her hair and makeup done every day. She'll sit in it, set an alarm, and then, because she's on so many painkillers, pass out while her hair and makeup guy gets her ready for the day. When the alarm goes off she'll wake up, and God forbid the poor guy isn't done yet. All hell breaks loose." Abdul's rep said, "There's no alarm that I've ever seen."

As far as the painkillers go, that doesn’t seem very far-fetched if you’ve seen her new reality show, in which she breaks down into hysterical crying at least two or three times per episode. But as far as passing out in a salon chair in your home while a paid minion does your hair and makeup, I’m 100% on board with that. If I had Paula’s resources, this is exactly what I would do (not yelling at the assistants, though. Don’t oppress the workers). In my case, it might be liquor that induced the nap, rather than painkillers, but most of the time I don’t even need a drink, just somewhere to sit down and I’m out like a light. I can’t think of a better way to start the morning than to nod off in a chair and wake up to find myself professionally groomed and “camera ready” as they say in the biz. I think the NY Post needs to lay off Paula about this, because ladies and gentlemen, this is what success is all about.